Let’s talk about PMDD, shall we? No, it’s not a new trendy acronym for a fancy cocktail or a tech startup. It stands for Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder. Trust me, if it were up to me, I’d choose a simpler, less tongue-twisting name. But alas, here we are, navigating the complexities of a condition that feels like a monthly rollercoaster ride through the depths of despair. In all honesty, to cut to the bare bone of it, its like a mini-monthly depression that can happen following a pregnancy, surgery, can appear in your 20’s-30’s or even from puberty. It can be due to genetics if your mother has it or any other mood or anxiety disorders running in the family as well as life stressors that can exacerbate the symptoms (Rosen, 2022).
PMS has more physical symptoms while PMDD has more mood symptoms.
Nichelle Haynes, DO, a psychiatrist at the Reproductive Psychiatry Clinic of Austin, Texas
According to Dr. Andrea J. Rapkin, Professor of Obstetrics and Gynecology at the David Geffen School of Medicine at UCLA, PMDD is characterized by “severe mood and physical symptoms that occur during the luteal phase, on average day 14-28 of the menstrual cycle.” In other words, it’s not just a case of the Monday blues; it’s a full-blown hormonal rollercoaster that hijacks your emotions and leaves you feeling like a passenger in your own body. It is debilitating and masking it when you’re at work or at a social gatherings is possible but also exhausting.
But here’s the kicker: despite its prevalence and debilitating effects, PMDD remains largely misunderstood and underdiagnosed. Dr. Susan G. Kornstein, Professor of Psychiatry and Obstetrics/Gynecology at Virginia Commonwealth University, explains that “the shame and stigma associated with PMDD often prevent women from seeking help or even acknowledging their symptoms.”
And therein lies the crux of the issue: the shame and stigma surrounding PMDD. In a society that often dismisses women’s health issues as mere hysteria or exaggeration, it’s no wonder that so many women suffer in silence, fearing judgment or ridicule. But as Dr. Jean Endicott, Professor Emerita of Clinical Psychology at Columbia University, reminds us, “PMDD is a real and treatable medical condition, not a figment of your imagination or a character flaw.”
The realities of living with PMDD
For those uninitiated in the art of PMDD, let me enlighten you. It’s like PMS (Premenstrual Syndrome) on steroids. Think of it as PMS’ evil twin, equipped with a pitchfork and a mischievous grin. While PMS might make you a tad cranky or weepy, PMDD takes it up a notch, throwing you into a whirlwind of mood swings, anxiety, irritability, and all-around chaos.
PMDD Symptoms Unleashed! -The Monthly Drama Series
Ever had a moment where you’re minding your own business, perhaps sipping on your favorite beverage, when suddenly, tears start flowing like a leaky faucet? Yep, that’s what we call spontaneous crying, and it’s the star attraction of this emotional rollercoaster. No ticket required for this tearful ride, folks. Just hop on and let the waterworks commence!
But wait, there’s more! Ever feel like the Hulk (FYI- image below is for fun, not actually in the Hulk mood), feeling like you could smash everything in sight at the slightest provocation? Welcome to the world of rage, my friend. It’s like someone dialed up the anger dial to eleven and threw away the knob. Suddenly, the littlest things send you spiraling into a fury that would make even the most seasoned superhero take a step back.
Picture this, you reach for your favorite snack or treat, only to discover that someone has eaten it without asking. The betrayal and sense of injustice send you into a tailspin of rage, as you struggle to contain your anger over what seems like a minor transgression.
Imagine trying to relax at home after work, but your partner’s loud phone call feels like an invasion of your space. Despite your attempts to ignore it, the frustration builds until you explode in anger, feeling overwhelmed by emotions that seem to come out of nowhere—this is just one example of how PMDD can turn everyday situations into triggers for intense rage.
And let’s not forget about irritability—oh no, we couldn’t leave that out if we tried. Sensitivity to sounds, loud noises, lights, close proximity, smells, or any other minor annoyances that gets amplified x100 during this phase of the menstrual cycle and even other people’s mere existence can feel like nails on a chalkboard during this time. Hence, isolating or doing things solo during this time feels wonderful! It’s like your tolerance meter took a vacation and left you with a permanent case of the grumps.
One particularly unwelcome visitor is the overwhelming sense of worthlessness. Picture this: you’re going about your day, and suddenly, out of nowhere, a tidal wave of negativity washes over you, convincing you that you’re not good enough, not worthy of love or success. It’s like a black cloud hovering over your every thought, dimming the brightness of your spirit. This sense of worthlessness isn’t just a fleeting moment of self-doubt; it’s a persistent, gnawing feeling that can color every aspect of your life, making even the simplest tasks feel insurmountable. Welcome to the rollercoaster ride of PMDD, where your self-worth takes a hit every month, leaving you questioning your place in the world.
Relationship Issues – Decoding Relationship Woes: Understanding Why Some Women Consider Breaking Up with Their Partners
Now, here’s where it gets interesting. PMDD doesn’t just mess with your mind and emotions; it has a knack for wreaking havoc on your relationships too. Case in point: my poor partner. Bless his soul, he’s been on the receiving end of my PMDD-fueled emotional rollercoaster more times than I care to count.
Every other month, like clockwork, I find myself staring at him, convinced he’s the root of all my problems. It’s like a scene out of a melodramatic soap opera, complete with dramatic monologues and the occasional dramatic storm-out (cue the dramatic music).
But here’s the kicker: it’s not him, it’s me. No, seriously, it’s not just a cop-out excuse to absolve him of any wrongdoing. It’s science, folks!
Ultimately it’s your closest relationships that take the biggest hit from your PMDD symptoms such as the husband, spouse, boyfriend or partner. Not simply because of the amount of time you spend together. But because “these are the people you feel safest with and freer to be most irritable and emotional with,” says Brooke Sprowl, LCSW, clinical director of My LA Therapy in California.
“PMDD can significantly strain relationships, as the intense mood swings and emotional volatility can make communication and understanding between partners extremely challenging. It’s crucial for partners to cultivate empathy, patience, and open communication to navigate the complexities of PMDD together.”
So, to all those well-meaning relatives who’ve raised their eyebrows and whispered behind our backs, blaming my partner for my PMDD-induced meltdowns, I have one thing to say: cut the guy some slack! He’s just trying to survive the emotional tornado that is PMDD, one chocolate bar and rom-com marathon at a time.
If Only I Had Known – Caught in the Crossfire
Ah, the lamentations of hindsight – if only I had known then what I know now. If only someone had pulled me aside during those awkward teenage years and whispered the secrets of PMDD in my ear, perhaps life would have unfolded a little more smoothly. Instead, I was left to navigate the treacherous waters of hormonal chaos armed with nothing but vague assurances that “it’s just your hormones, dear.”
Little did I know, those seemingly innocuous fluctuations in mood and temperament were the tip of the PMDD iceberg, lurking beneath the surface, waiting to wreak havoc on my emotional landscape. If only I had been taught in school that PMDD is more than just a passing phase, more than just “normal hormonal fluctuations.” Perhaps then, I wouldn’t have spent so many sleepless nights agonizing over whether I was losing my mind or simply succumbing to the whims of my Gemini duality.
But alas, life had other plans, and I found myself caught in the crossfire of PMDD-induced chaos, grappling with the fallout of misunderstood emotions and misplaced blame. It’s a familiar tale for many women like myself, who find themselves unwittingly caught in the cycle of PMDD, unaware of the storm brewing within until it’s too late.
And so, the cycle continues – the ebb and flow of emotions, the rollercoaster ride of PMDD, leaving in its wake a trail of confusion and heartache. For some, it may lead to the dissolution of relationships, the strains of divorce or the solitude of single motherhood. But for others, like myself, it’s a journey of self-discovery and resilience, a testament to the strength of the human spirit in the face of adversity.
So here’s to embracing the chaos, to riding the waves of PMDD with grace and fortitude, and to finding solace in the knowledge that we are not alone in our struggles.
PMDD is a beast of its own, capable of turning even the most rational, level-headed woman into a hormonal tornado. But fear not, fellow PMDD warriors, for we’re in this together. So let’s raise a glass (or a box of tissues) to surviving the monthly rollercoaster ride with our sanity intact. And to my partner, if you’re reading this: I promise, it’s not you, it’s just my PMDD talking.
If you think that you may have PMDD please consult a professional such as psychologist or psychiatrist to give you more support in living with this condition.
Leave a comment below if you’d like to know more about PMDD and how we can support one another.
Keep Living, Keep Going Forward
Christiane